Struggling To Keep The Peace In Your Family?
Are you a parent who is struggling to reduce ongoing conflict in your family? Has your child been exhibiting symptoms of anxiety, depression, or emotional distress that are creating problems at home or at school? Are you noticing increased tantrums, behavioral issues, or sibling rivalry in one or more of your children?
You may have noticed that as your child approaches adolescence or their teenage years, that their temperament is changing and they have become less agreeable—perhaps even rebellious. Maybe you have been concerned that their academic performance is suffering because of changes at home, in their social life, or in their community.
Perhaps your family has undergone a big transition, like a divorce, a blending of families, or the death of a loved one. You may be concerned that unresolved tension among various members of your family is contributing to feelings of alienation and anger that are adversely affecting you, your spouse, and/or your children.
If any of these descriptions apply, it’s likely that you wonder when your household will once again feel a sense of peace and serenity. And while these conflicts can be difficult to overcome, therapy offers your family an opportunity to find new perspectives and resolutions with a like-minded support system that shares your values.
All Families Struggle With Moments Of Disagreement And Disconnect
Every single family experiences some degree of conflict or tension. And the internal challenges that the vast majority of families face are completely normal. Though some families have fewer arguments or more techniques for de-escalation, stressors from both within the household and outside of it often carry the potential to exacerbate existing issues of conflict and misunderstanding.
In a family-oriented community such as ours, there is pressure attached to parenting that causes us to think we have done something wrong if there is a persistent conflict with our children. When our kids misbehave or act out, we often grow frustrated with ourselves for not having a foolproof approach to parenting. And for those of us who are part of a church community, we can feel especially compelled to keep our children following in our footsteps even if they have expressed a lack of interest in the church or made lifestyle choices that don’t fall in line with our moral code.
The truth is that knowing how to best relate to our children and create the right course of action for correcting misbehaviors is extremely difficult when we are so emotionally attached to them. We tend to have blinders on when thinking about what is best for our children and upon their push-back, we get caught in a vicious cycle of distance and discord. Teens often feel as though they will be punished for individuating and/or expressing their needs, and younger children
usually don’t have the vocabulary to relay their emotions and feelings.
At Carbajal Counseling, our therapists are specially trained in the field of child and adolescent development. Our team is well-versed in creating an environment where your kid can feel safe and secure to explore their thoughts and feelings. There is no shame in seeking therapy for your family; counseling can often result in refreshed perspective, positive communication, and increased mutual respect between parent and child.
Therapy Can Pave The Way For Renewed Understanding And Reconnection Within Your Family
In a safe, secure, and compassionate space, therapy will give each member of your family an opportunity to express themselves honestly. With the unbiased and supportive perspective of a counselor or therapist, you will be invited to navigate your familial conflicts and explore potential solutions. Given the neutral nature of the therapeutic space, your family will be provided with a chance to practice healthy and positive interactions without as much potential for escalation.
We tailor all of our therapeutic sessions to meet the needs of the family. If that means seeing parents and children separated at the outset of treatment, then we will arrange for more individualized sessions. If instead, to maintain the trust and transparency of all involved, it makes sense to meet as one unit, then we will plan for an all-family session. Our goal at the beginning of therapy will be to determine your family’s unique dynamics and needs.
Throughout the course of counseling, we will focus on the conflict in general rather than specific conflicts themselves. By identifying the areas where a communication breakdown has occurred or where there is an opportunity for renewed perspective, you and your kid(s) will be better prepared to de-escalate in the future. We have witnessed firsthand that when these communication skills are established and put into action, ongoing conflicts and arguments tend to resolve themselves.
Moreover, if there are mental health issues—such as anxiety, depression, or other disorders—affecting one or more members of your family, therapy will give you an opportunity to better understand how certain symptoms are impacting both the individual and the group as a whole. Together, we will strategize ways to demonstrate recognition and support, so that your family unit can be more cohesive, functional, and mutually supportive.
By the time you have wrapped up your time in therapy, we are confident that you, as individuals, will be better at communicating and regulating emotions within the family unit. If you and your are able to temper feelings of anxiety and frustration during an argument, both of you will be more effective in relaying your needs and finding solutions together.
Our team at Carbajal Counseling includes Licensed Marriage and Family Therapists (LMFT) and counselors who are trained in family-specific modalities. We pride ourselves on being able to connect and form relationships with each member of a family. Moreover, this group of therapists and counselors come from a wide variety of spiritual backgrounds and we are confident that we can find a great therapeutic fit based on your family’s emotional needs and religious preferences.
While therapy is hard work, we have witnessed families benefit from the payoff of increased mutual support, connection, and love. This process gives you an opportunity to understand your child more fully, and vice versa. And while it takes time, energy, and commitment, therapy can be hugely rewarding as you and your family determine the trajectory of your life’s most essential relationships.
Perhaps you are interested in seeking counseling services for your family, but you have some concerns…
Our family is so busy with work, school, and other commitments that we don’t have the time to invest in family therapy.
If ongoing conflict is affecting your ability to feel peaceful and present at home, it’s important to prioritize the mental health of your family as a whole. And counseling is the first step in establishing solutions to the ongoing conflicts affecting you and your children. While therapy requires your time, energy, and resources, we are confident that it will pay off in the long term and likely save you time negotiating and arguing in the future.
My child is opposed to attending therapy with the family.
At Carbajal Counseling, we are invested in connecting with your young child or teenager first and foremost, so that they can understand what a valuable component they are to this process. By speaking the language of your children, we can help them feel seen and heard. We are highly familiar with activities that will help your kid to feel connected and cared for, whether that means incorporating play therapies for younger children or expressive therapies for teens.
If you can get your kid in the door for the first session, we are confident that our counselors and therapists will create an experience that will encourage them to stay.
Do I need to be in session with my child/children?
This answer will vary from family to family. Drawing from the needs of your child/children and the family unit as a whole, we will work together to determine the best course of action for family therapy. Regardless of how much you are in session, we want you to feel included and invested in the process. As such, we will continue to assess the needs of your family throughout the course of counseling.
Learn New Ways To Connect As A Family
If your family is struggling with ongoing conflict, mental health issues, or emotional disconnect, therapy at Carbajal Counseling can help you re-establish harmony at home. To learn more about our team, check out our therapist bios or call (801)989-3488 to schedule an appointment today.
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